I was in such a deep sleep, that it took a while to register the persistent ring tone of my alarm. The chirpy and happy ring tone had no place in my quest to regain sleep, yet the continuous and increasingly annoying tone, would not shut up!
With a groan, I turned over, pulling the covers high over my shoulders burrowing deeper into the warmth. I tried coaxing the sleep back while I yelled at the alarm to shut the fuck up! Mind you, the yelling was taking place in my head - my lips were firmly shut, as were my eyes.
Now any sane, wide-awake, jump-out-of-bed-the-instant-they-wake-up human being, would tell you that yelling at the alarm in your head does jack shit to silence it unless telepathic abilities were in play. Yea right! Telepathic abilities, right about now, would be nice but rest assured, I had not suddenly obtained such powers overnight. The only way to stop the unrelenting sounds would be to physically reach out and swipe the screen.
Yes. You got it, my alarm is my phone and knowing my struggle to wake up in the morning, I have like a gazillion alarms set up to go off once the other has run its course. Admittedly, I spent quality time, setting up all those alarms, selecting the most aggravating and jaunty tone from the phone sound database. I guess, in the middle of the day, the melodies selected had me nodding my head in time to the upbeat sounds, but it is a totally different story when you are trying stay asleep and they go off one after the other!
I know the internal dialog taking place in my head was useless and one thing was a given - the communication that my brain screamed out to my hand, was being ignored. My hand refused to head out from under the covers, into the cold air, to turn the incessant noise off! Instead, I opted to stick my head under my pillow in an attempt to shut out the melodies being broadcasting to the room in their bid to get me up. Melodies? What was I thinking! Right about now, my brain registered them as noise. Very irritating noise.
At this moment in time, I really missed my old phone as I could yell out 'STOP' and the alarm would be silenced. Mind you, I had to say 'stop' a few times - one for every alarm setup - but by the time the last alarm came on, I had yelled myself awake and given myself high blood pressure!
When the battery of my old phone blew up, I was super excited for I would get the latest smart phone. It was faster, could multi-task and in summary it was a mini version of a tablet which with the right applications could double as one. I was practically doing cartwheels all the way to the store. I became anti-social while I acquainted myself with it and when the alarm went off the next day and it failed to silence when I yelled out 'stop', my bubble burst.
On that day, I must admit to waking up instantly, grabbing my phone to figure out which setting had I not 'checked' to get it to 'listen' to my voice command. Going through each and every setting three times, I admitted defeat and turned to Google - my super best friend when I need answers ASAP! Turns out that the new model does not come with that feature! Agh! How totally frustrating as I now have to physically turn off the alarm(s).
So, here I am, letting my alarm drive me nuts for no reason other than I am most definitely not a morning person. Now I can hear all you say, "Wouldn't it be easier to silence it once and for all and wake up naturally?"
Yes! Would be my response, just like any other sane person would do. However, I think I might be short of a few marbles and twisted as it sounds, I think I do enjoy waking up all angry and aggravated as I use the anger to fuel my day.
Yup, shake your heads all you want for I am not all there.
Copyright Tia J. Lee 2015
